Monday, 21 November 2011

Guilty of Cheating


Do you ever feel being caught by the teacher while you are cheating? For me, yes I do. It happens today, sometimes when I saw my friends were cheating, and they showed their satisfied face, yes it is quite annoying, because when I finish a test by myself and they finish it together.

Today is my bad day, yes a bad day. Even until now I cannot describe my feeling, if you said I am angry, I am not. If you say I am disappointed, yes, a little. Perhaps I feel so guilty, that is absolutely yes. What kind of guilty is it? 

In my math lesson, the teacher, (initialed as Mr.B), he does not like students who are cheating. Thousand times already I heard about that, and I believe I will not become a victim one day. Today we passed our math test, and I can finish for almost 15-17 questions from 20. In the middle of the test my back friend asked my friend’s answer. I ignored him, so that I continued filling answers one by one. I see Mr.B does not pay attention to our area, so that I ask for one answer. My friend said it was 24. Then I just wrote it down, but soon, he asked me back again,” Is it 24 right?.” I ignore and once again he asked in louder voice, “The answer is 24 right? Right??”. I was annoyed by that distraction so that I nodded once to say yes. Mr.B caught us when I was nodded and divided our score into two. Poor I am! I just feel I am a decoy, sometimes I thought I was stupid on that time, I was not angry, but freezing just like a statue. Then I answered other unfilled question by guessing and got out from the class. I do not feel so angry or disappointed with my score or any other feeling that show I am not guilty, but I DO FEEL GUILTY OF MR.B WARNING.He is a good teacher, but I ignore his warning. It is just like when I was given a sack of gold, but I choose a clumps of coal. 

Dear readers, you will be angry because you are being caught and because you nodded for once only, but I do not feel the same. I feel so guilty. It is just because Mr.B has warned us, but I just do it consciously. Stupid I am. I just feel so sinful, thought one day I go to hell because one of this sin. I am planning to apologize but I am afraid. Now, I am reminded by our religion lesson, when people say sorry it is hard for us to forgive them, but when we apologize for some mistakes, I am even afraid to say one word.
I hope I won’t reply it anymore and this incident will be a good learning for everybody and I wish I have a braveness to apologize. Once again, I do not want to beg for scores, so I will just apologize without any other wish.
Thanks & Regards   

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